PARADIGMA

This zine has photos dating from 2015 to 2021
Shot both in digital and analog.

All hand made by Carolina Sepúlveda.

"Paradigma represents the constant of my life, my romantic heart and my very rational mind, me wanting to be with the same person for the rest of my life and me wanting to lay with every spark I feel. I’m anxious with change, and my hunger for spontaneity.
The constant feeling that something isn’t quite right with me, and that knowledge that I love myself. It’s been a battle to live my life for the last 10 years, wanting to be less angry, less boring, less petty, less loud, cry less, be less manly, focus more, study more, and then go out more, meet more people, have more relations, have more sex, smoke more joints, drink more alcohol, make more people love me.
Anxiety, trauma, panic attacks, mania, these are constants that hang around my head. After my nana died this January I found myself working 12 to 14 hours a day without being able to think about anything else, this is a pattern I’ve been repeating for a long time, in order to prevent myself from thinking about painful things and in order to stop myself from crashing.
Patterns and routines, I’ve always hated them, routine is good for my body and feel wrong in my head. I’ve really got to know myself over these last 7 years since I moved out of my parents and had space to not feel angry all the time, to fall in and out of love, to feel lust, to discover kinks and triggers, to get over my lack of self-love, and self-worth, to win the crusade with my dark thoughts, and so far that’s what I’ve done."